The Turkey Curse is a curse that is placed on those who seek to harm you; it is used to disorient as well as to frighten off potential predators. This curse is known to be the most beneficial when you are in a circumstance in which you have lost the power or control of the situation.
An example of this would be if you were to be randomly getting mugged on the street and you required immediate justice, you would use the Turkey Curse to debilitate your attackers.
How It Works:
The first thing that you would do in the event of an attack is to stop suddenly in your tracks, drop all of your stuff, and close your eyes. This confuses the attackers right away. But then begin to yell out loud over and over again while spinning three times in a circle:
‘GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE’
Then spit at the feet of those you are cursing and while doing so, focus all of your intention on them becoming disoriented while all the while preparing yourself to make a fast exit.
The reason this is such an effective tool when trying to defend yourself is that typically, common criminals are more afraid of crazy people and disease then they are anything else. Therefore part of why this works is because you are technically scaring them. Doing so will at the very least distract them enough so that you can get away and at best you make them leave you alone.
An Electrical Variation:
The point of the turkey curse in this instance is also used to inflict disorientation into the minds of the attackers in regards to machinery, electricity or methods of communication. It has been said to be the curse that causes even a person’s toaster to be out to get them.
In this curse you would focus on any and all electrical objects around the attacker going wrong. Trying to shock them or cause them physical harm. Also this curse is said to last for 30 days as a result of this attacker’s bad ways.
If you were to try to use this curse on someone who didn’t deserve it, say for example just because you are just mad at them and are having a bad day, then it is said that the curse would reverse itself and you would instead be the person effected. Keep this in mind when participating with the Turkey Curse.
The energy behind this particular curse is chaotic and not something that can be controlled. It fights on your behalf for justice so that you can get to safety but it is not meant to be misused in any way.
The Discordian Method
On the more light and fluffy side of the world, the practitioners of Discordia, also known as Discordians (commonly known for their…unconventional methods) also use the Turkey Curse but in a modified way and for different reasons.
Discordians use the Turkey Curse as a way of neutralizing negative energy that is being emitted by a particularly crabby or cranky person to whom they refer as Greyfaces. Greyfaces are people who are stuck in their ways, unhappy, and generally not pleasant to be around.
Most times, Discordians will refer to the GrayFace as the government, or those who are stuck walking a monotonous and lifeless path. The Turkey Curse as designated by Discordia is designed to shake the person loose of their stalemate so that they can see life for the abundant and potentially prosperous place that it can be.
You can also do this to yourself, should you be experiencing a time where you are taking life too seriously and you are feeling a lackluster about the goodness in life; doing so, will help to raise your vibrations back up to more of a workable middle ground.
Discordians try not to take themselves or others, or even life for that matter too seriously, because life, to them, is just a random bunch of stuff that happens and it’s just not worth getting worked up over. The Turkey Curse is used to help those that are in need of a jovial ‘kick in the pants,’ spiritually speaking. And their version (according to the Principia Discordia) goes something like this:
The Turkey Curse, Discordian Style
“Take a foot stance as if you were John L. Sullivan preparing for fisticuffs. Face the particular greyface you wish to short-circuit, or towards the direction of the negative aneristic vibration that you wish to neutralize. Begin waving your arms in any elaborate manner and make motions with your hands as though you were Mandrake feeling up a sexy giantess.
Chant, loudly and clearly:
GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE
The results will be instantly apparent.”
As you can see, the technique utilized by the Discordians is a funnier way to go, but chances are you can use this exact same style to disorient potential attackers. However that does change the spirit in which the Discordians practice this curse. But, they would most likely shrug their shoulders and say, ‘To each his own.’
About These Curses:
The first curse is for self-preservation of the physical kind, and the second example is for self-preservation of the spiritual kind. Health and safety are your birthrights. Happiness and joy is like having a delicious desert. If you use the Turkey Curse wisely, you will find that you are a safer and happier person.
Found at: Aunty Flo
When you have chosen your kitten from the kindle (litter), being sure that this little mite is the one upon whom you wish to bestow your friendship and protection, know that this is a magickal pact, for you are guardian of the spirit of your cat, and he or she in like manner is invested with the occult power to guide and guard your spirit. You must think next of the naming ceremony, which is best done after some little acquaintance with the nature of your new friend.
Choose a pet-name for the cat’s child-spirit, and it is better if this be a folk-name, for these names have been magickally sealed with power and tradition through the ages, and the flavor of the earth is in them, and of the spirits of the earth, and of hearth and home.
Your friend may retain no more than a child-spirit for all his or her life long, but let it be given a secret, occult name also, in any event, for such a name will nurture the mysteries in the cat’s soul. It will protect the creature from malignant forces, will throw the Devil askew, and aid in the unfolding of his or her heart so that in the next life the animal may return with a spirit more gracious, bright and fair.
And if it should be that, after a year’s passing, you discover unto yourself that your cat has indeed already achieved seniority of soul, then it is meet that the animal should be given a grander name, a Name of Distinction, to inspire, foster and encourage the qualities that are beginning to reveal themselves, so that this treasure-hoard may grow and grow, and come to shine with divine brilliance like the stars of the night.
Do not hesitate to give your cat three names, for there is the inspiration of the Holy Trinity in it, and cats especially are animals of the Soul of All Things.
To name a cat three times whispers too of the uniform nature of the moon, for does not the night Goddess appear to us with either a full round face, or waxing with horns towards the east, or yet waning with horns towards the west? And in her pretty crescent or her majestic fullness, do we not see a likeness when we study the cat’s eye, for does not the contraction and dilation of its pupil speak to us of Bride and Artemis, goddesses of the new moon and the full? The cat is ever the creature of the night and goddess of the night.
- For a long list of cat names see this post on Magickal Cat Names
To name your kitty, it is well to choose one of the Egyptian days of our calendar, and to gather valerian to make into a few drops of oil, so that you may anoint him or her just on the tip of the nose and behind the ears.
An old manuscript says:
Three days there are in the year which we call Egyptian days, and this is so because they were days of great divinity and consequence to the astrologers of ancient Egypt. These three days fall on the last Monday in April, the second Monday in August, and the third Monday in December.
All of the Egyptian days are Mondays, that is, days of the moon, and so we may call upon Butis, the Goddess of Night, Diana, the Goddess of the Ascended Moon, Isis, the Goddess of the Moon at her Rising, and Sekhmet, the Lady of Flame, for she is of vital power, a seer by night, and a goddess of might whose inspiration fires the mind and elevates it to acts of heretic magick and wmoan’s wisecraft.
On such an Egyptian night, take your kitten in your arms and stand in some sequestered place, wild and lovely, where you may see the moon as she rides the skies. Have a little vial of Valerian oil ready in your pocket, and scatter a few drops around yourself upon the turf to make a magick circle.
Call upon the four angels, Kokaviel, Ghedoriah, Chokmahiel and Savaniah, for these angels are of Mercury’s messenger spirit, and he is Lord of Naming. Call down the blessing of the goddesses of the night, and imagine yourself to be standing in a pure white temple, framed by magick’s skill.
Anoint the kitten, and tell the baptismal name to the stars, afterwards proclaiming thus:
Your name I set upon your brow
And to four shining angels bow
This mark of grace your guardian be
And make your name a magick key
Goddesses of Moon and Might
Bless my spells this Egypt’s night.
The spell is now worked. After thanking the angels, spirits and goddesses who worked with you, and bowing three times to the moon and the stars, you may homewards wend your way, deservedly satisfied with the night’s enterprise and your weaving of woman’s mysteries.
Found at: It’s A Cat Astrophe
This Protective Blessing Ritual was held on Saint George’s Day (April 23 by the Julian calendar, or May 6 by Gregorian calendar) . In many communities, Saint George’s Day was the day animals were lead out into the field, thus protective, blessing rituals abound.
Lead all healthy animals three times around the perimeter of their field, barn or home, always in a sunwise direction. The person leading the parade carries a lit torch. The person bringing up the rear holds an open padlock in one hand, the key in the other hand. After the third round, the animals are lead back into the barn.
Turn the key in the lock. Throw the key into a river or stream, while preserving the now permanently locked padlock.
This blessing spell for livestock is meant to be performed on St George’s day (April 23 by the Julian calendar, or May 6 by Gregorian calendar) .
Preserve a palm blessed on Palm Sunday (If this isn’t available or appropriate you may substitute a sacred protective plant, such as wormwood or rosemary.)
Place this before a sacred image, together with two whole raw eggs and a pot filled with raw barley.
Light candles before the image. (Some versions of this spell specify a church candle.) Use the flame from a candle to light a torch.
Group all the animals to be protected in a circle.
One person circles around the animals carrying the torch, while a second person sprinkles Holy Water, or another protective water formula onto the animals, using the palm frond, rosemary or wormwood plant.
The animals are then driven to pasture by slapping them with the palm frond, rosemary, or wormwood plant.
When this is complete, throw the palm frond plant into running water. Sow the barley in the ground, and break the eggs on the ground away from your property.
Found in: Element Encyclopedia of 5000 Spells
For this spell to find a lost cat or other small pet, you’ll need the assistance of a tree, rock, or other outdoor entity—preferably one in your yard or very near your home. Take one of your pet’s favorite toys and some pet food to the tree. Tell the tree about your pet and that you are concerned because of how long he or she has been missing. Ask the tree if it will help you by providing a beacon for your pet to follow to get home. Leave the pet food near the tree. If a small rock gets your attention, bring it and the pet toy into the house. Keep them near the door. Every time you pass the toy, thank the tree for its help in providing a beacon for your pet.
Source: Therese Francis
Pow-Wow strongly incorporates the use of spoken charms. This one is used to soothe a threatening dog and provide protection – excellent for those forced to walk past a snarling, snapping canine.
The charm must be repeated three times before you reach the dog (or the dog reaches you!)
Dog, hold thy nose to the ground!
God has made thee, me and hound.
Then form the sign of the cross three times.
If you would like some advice about what sort of magick is needed, simply enter a short explanation of your situation. Our resident witch will be happy to assist. Good Luck!!