Poetry I Love

The birds’ favorite songs
You do not hear,

For their most flamboyant music takes place
When their wings are stretched
Above the trees

And they are smoking the opium
Of pure freedom.

It is healthy for the prisoner
To have faith

That one day she will again move about
Wherever she wants,
Feel the wondrous gift of life –
Less structured,

Find all wounds, and debts stamped
canceled, Paid.

I once asked a bird,
“How is it that you fly in this gravity
Of darkness?”

She responded,

“Love lifts Me.”

– Hafiz, The Gift

This was titled “Metaphysical Poem” and every time I read it, I get very confused… which might be the purpose of it… or the point… I don’t know. And I have no idea what it means… which again, might be the point and/or the purpose… anyway, here it is:

When do you want to go
I’m not sure I want to go there
where do you want to go
any place
I think I’d fall apart any place else
well I’ll go if you really want to
I don’t particularly care
but you’ll fall apart any place else
I can just go home
I don’t really mind going there
but I don’t want to force you to go there
you won’t be forcing me I’d just as soon
I wouldn’t be able to stay long anyway
maybe we could go somewhere nearer
I’m not wearing a jacket
just like you weren’t wearing a tie
well I didn’t say we had to go
I don’t care whether you’re wearing one
we don’t really have to do anything
well all right let’s not
okay I’ll call you
yes call me

~Frank O’Hara

One day in the park
I had quite a surprise.
I met a girl
who had many eyes.

She was really quite pretty
(and also quite shocking!)
and I noticed she had a mouth,
so we ended up talking.

We talked about flowers,
and her poetry classes,
and the problems she’d have
if she ever wore glasses.

It’s great to know a girl
who has so many eyes,
but you really get wet
when she breaks down and cries.”

~Tim Burton

Everything changed when I forgave myself.

I have crooked teeth. I was born with strange toes and sometimes my heart speeds up. I’m not good with people, always keeping to myself, and I have two brothers I don’t even know.

But I’m trying to smile even though my teeth don’t look like a toothpaste commercial. I’m walking bare feet thinking ’who decided how toes are supposed to look?’ and I’m trying not to wear oversized clothes just to hide my body. I still keep to myself a lot, but sometimes I try to show up and reach out, and sometimes that’s all it takes.
I’m trying to both honour myself and grow myself.

Everything changed when I learned to honour my body instead of fighting it. When I learned to take care of it, like a precious castle to protect this weary heart. To stop harming it, punishing it for looking like this or that, feeling like this or that. I don’t look like they all told me I had to do, but I’m healthy and strong and vital. That is enough.

Everything changed when I forgave myself.

I never got a record deal. I never found a manager who believed in what I did. I never got to tour in a tour bus, with a band, in front of big crowds,
and I never got to do all those things I fought with all my life for, for so long.

But I started my own record label and built my own deal. I learned to manage myself and I even created my own concept for touring. With friends as a band. With my very own supporters as a crowd. I created my own path.

Everything changed when I switched from saying ‘I have to do this’ to ‘I GET to do this’. When I started viewing my music as a way to serve instead of building for own profit. When I tried to meet people with an open heart and a will to love them instead of guarding my own history of solitude and brokeness.

Dedication. Giving. Loving.
That is the goal.

Everything changed when I forgave myself for all the things I couldn’t be.

I’m not famous, successful, rich or popular. I don’t have a large group of friends, a big house or academic qualifications to get me a job: heck I never even had a job!

But I get to do me. Full out. Peacefully. With no one telling me to go there or do that, be this or sign here. I get to explore every corner of my own personality, on my own. Every passion, every talent, and follow wherever it might lead me.

I’m not everything I want to be, but I’m more than I was, and I’m still learning.

I’m happy. Just sitting here. Knowing I have a few friends. Knowing I have a dream to work on. Knowing I have somewhere to go if it starts raining. A pillow to rest my head on. Someone to call when I get lonely. Nature to walk in, pure air, early mornings, seasons and weather. This is enough. This is more than enough.
and most of all, I am enough.

Everything changed when I forgave myself.

~♡ Charlotte Eriksson

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