Just Do It

One Big Thing

Published July 29, 2023 | By shirleytwofeathers

Ok guys! One big thing! What’s your one big thing that would absolutely make your life better. What’s one big step you could take to Radically take care of you? Not all the things… just one thing. One big thing!

My big thing is my toilet problem… it may sound trivial, but my toilet hasn’t flushed properly for like… I don’t know… 2 years? A really long time of procrastinating and dreading having to deal with it Definitely an energy drain due to all the resistance. Plus, I think it’s a big red flag signaling loud and clear that I am not taking very good care of me.

This is the week, today is the day, now is the time! I’m going to deal with it. What about you? What are you going to deal with? Are you going to summon your inner warrior? Call upon your inner dad? Maybe call a committee meeting? Be your own best boss? Are you going to divide it up into easy steps? Or go for the gold?

I’ve got a plan based on The Art of War. It goes like this:

My biggest “enemy” right now, in this moment is my toilet that doesn’t want to flush properly. My weakness and limitation is that I don’t want to hire a plumber to come to my house and fix it because I’m feeling reclusive and weird.

On the positive side, I’m pretty sure I understand myself, my limitations, and my weaknesses.

My resources are that I have enough money to buy parts, or even a new toilet if necessary. I also have a person who has volunteered to come over and help. And I have access to google and YouTube for DIY and How-To informational articles and videos.

What’s next? A good strategy, obviously! Because:

The Skillful Strategist
Defeats the enemy without doing battle.
Captures the city without laying siege.
Overthrows the enemy state without protracted war.

There are five essentials for victory:
Know when to fight and when not to fight;
Understand how to deploy large and small numbers;
Have officers and men who share a single will;
Be ready for the unexpected;
Have a capable General unhampered by his sovereign.

OK so! I need a good plan. A clear vision of what I’m up against… meaning I’ll need to “spy” on toilet experts posting on YouTube, and I’ll need to have a good understanding of the basics of toilet installation and maintenance.

My helper and I will need to be in agreement about what we are doing, and we will need adequate supplies, an internet connection in case we need to do a quick google search, and a real plumber on speed dial. Also, we’ll need to have great timing.

Definitely need to call a meeting. Schedule an intervention of sorts. My inner boss, who is the Best Boss Ever, can make sure we have all of our ducks in a row, and my Inner Dad can take the dog for a walk (LOL). I’ll channel my hero, the best most famous plumber I can imagine, and schedule my inner warrior to show up and help us power through. Our success is assured!

Now it’s your turn! JUST DO IT!

Posted in Radical Self Care | Tagged Just Do It | 3 Comments

Slaying Your Demons

Published July 26, 2023 | By shirleytwofeathers

What I’m talking about here are our inner demons, soul sucking situations, and the self defeating circumstances we have boxed ourselves into. And let’s also include the people in our lives that are the enemies of our self esteem and peace of mind.

The Arabic saying is….”Should you sit in your doorway long enough… you will see the bodies of all your enemies carried past you….”

So, what do these quotes actually really mean? I don’t know. But I, for one, am tired of waiting. What about you? Are you tired of waiting? Let’s get proactive! Today let’s actually do something! Let’s do some inner and outer head hunting.

Let’s kick some ass and take some names… which means having multiple victories over a number of opponents in quick succession, with a pace showing that this feat is not over yet. “kicking ass” means completely conquering an opponent, usually to a humiliating level, basically “kicking their ass”.

On the other hand, “taking names” refers to marking a number of individuals which have not been beaten yet, to be beaten later. It derives from the mafia, as taking names of future victims helps in finding more information and keeping track of them.

With that in mind… let’s do some name taking first. Who are your inner demons? What are your soul sucking situations? And lets add in the names of the people in our lives that definitely need to back off or go away. Here are some of mine:

Dread
Resistance
Procrastination
Avoidance
I Should (as opposed to I could)
Anxiety
Paralysis
Negative Self Talk
Self Defeating Behavior

Here’s an example…

When I have to do something that seems hard and not fun on any level, I PROCRASTINATE the doing of it, and spend a large amount of time catering to DREAD and RESISTANCE, and having ANXIETY because I am AVOIDING what I SHOULD be doing, which inevitably leads me into a state of PARALYSIS during which I sit and stare at my phone or the television and BERATE myself for doing nothing, all the while, dreading, resisting, and procrastinating whatever it is that I think I should be doing that I’m not doing.

However:

I will say that I also get a huge payoff from that behavior because after a certain amount of sitting and doing nothing, I can usually distract myself with an art project or my website. My best art usually happens when I’m busily avoiding and resisting practical life stuff.

My website, including this project, is a direct result of me resisting and procrastinating stuff that wasn’t getting done 5 years ago, and still isn’t getting done today.

I think this will clearly require some more thought. I absolutely do not want to sacrifice my creative projects on the altar of practical day to day chores and bullshit. There has to be a way to preserve my pay off while actively working towards a better quality of life. What about you? What’s your pay off?

So… Kicking Ass…

Today I’m going to tackle at least one of my demons. I’m going to hit the procrastination demon head on and stop putting off my household chores and exercise plan. Right now. I’m going to just do that stuff. All the stuff on my to do list that I’m wanting to put off till later (or never) are going to get done today. Hell or high water. I’m going to rush through it… do a blitz attack.. and then sink back into something creative and interesting.

In my mind, it looks like this:

The reality will probably be more like this:

What about you? What are your demons? Where is your pay off? Is there just one thing you can have a “come to Jesus” moment with today? What is it? And what are you waiting for?

Just Do It!

Remember, we don’t have to win the war today, but we can at least win a battle and maybe even gain a tactical advantage!

Posted in Radical Self Care | Tagged Just Do It, Motivational, Overcoming Obstacles, Road Blocks | Leave a comment

Let’s Get Simple

Published July 20, 2023 | By shirleytwofeathers

I don’t know about you guys, but my “I need help” notes are looking more and more like a “to do” list and less and less like a “be kind to Shirley” project. I’m feeling overwhelmed by the impossibility of dealing with them. I definitely didn’t want to set us up for failure and yet that’s how it is starting to feel to me. So I came up with an idea…

Remember our fun little post about Using Your Words? I decided to apply it to the “needs” collection of notes that I compiled at the beginning of our project (Let’s Get Radical). Here’s how it went ~ these are my actual notes:

My bathroom faucets are almost totally clogged up but I don’t have to do anything about it today.
There is not enough music in my life and I can do something about that right now if I want to.
There is a giant tree branch in my yard and I don’t care.
My car is rusting where paint has peeled off and that’s ok because it has 300,000+ miles on it and I can always buy some spray paint and cover it up if I want to.
The yard is way over gown and I don’t care.
The Magick room is cluttered and messy but not all the time, and I’ll clean it up when I’m ready.
My daily meditation practice is non-existent and that’s OK.
My Kwan Yin outdoor garden area is overgrown and neglected but that’s OK because it has a water moccasin guarding it and I’m not going to mess with him, not today anyway.

There were way a lot more, but you get the idea. I pulled all of my notes out and wrote a good answer on the ones I’m going to release into the wild and ripped them up. I put some of the others on an actual “to do” list. It felt really good. Like I have forgiven myself for the chaos around here, and liberated Shirley from the YOU SHOULD’s that have been dogging her for months.

I did, however keep two needs in my container. These are the two that I am actually going to make myself deal with. I chose them because it will be a huge sigh of relief to get them taken care of, and getting them taken care of will definitely make my life better. Here they are:

My toilet doesn’t flush properly.
Siding is falling off my house because wood is rotting behind it.

Obviously, for me, Radical Self Care revolves around maintaining my environment. This makes it simple because there are actual practical solutions. I actually can fix my toilet or buy a new one. And while I can’t do much about my wood rot (long story), it won’t be impossible to do a quick fix Band-Aid repair that will last through winter.

This little exercise really was helpful for me. I discovered what it was that I really want to do something about and liberated me from all the busy work that I am not interested in doing. It lightened my load, and gave me a boost of enthusiasm for the two things I’ve been dreading and avoiding for months.

So, what about you? Can you simplify your wants and needs for self care? Are there just one or two things that would make all the difference? Do you WANT to address them?

If so… call a committee meeting with yourself, make a plan of action, divide it into small easy bites, schedule a date a place and a time … and just dig in. Remember an epic journey begins with one small step followed by another, followed by more small steps with maybe a random number of mad dashes and desperate scrambles.

Posted in Radical Self Care | Tagged Decluttering, Just Do It, Overcoming Obstacles, Setting Goals | 2 Comments

If Only!

Published July 17, 2023 | By shirleytwofeathers

I saw an ad for a game on Facebook and my first thought was…”if only it was this easy to take care of ourselves!”

Which brings me to what I want to explore today:

Why isn’t it easy?
What is the hardest part of self care?
Is there something really simple that would make it easier?
What if self care ACTUALLY IS easy, and we just THINK it’s hard?
Do I overthink it?
Maybe if instead of thinking about being considerate of me, I just did it?

I realize that it’s just a video game, but if I had a dollar for every time I wished I could just… OH WAIT! I just watched it to the end… it’s all about choices, isn’t it?

Here it is in action. I really really wish it was this easy in real life!!

Note: If you saw this before, you’ll notice that I had to move the video because it covered up part of the text when I looked at it on my phone.

So now, I’m wondering…

How many times did I choose dynamite instead of matches when it came to making decisions for myself?
What about you? In your personal life do you choose the “cozy rocker” or the hard wooden chair?

And isn’t this what life is all about really? Making choices and then dealing with the consequences?

Posted in Radical Self Care | Tagged Just Do It, Overcoming Obstacles, Video | 6 Comments

Divide and Conquer

Published July 14, 2023 | By shirleytwofeathers

One of the things that I’ve discovered is that, for me at least, dividing impossible stuff into smaller more manageable portions makes it more likely that I can do it. For example. As part of my “best boss ever” protocol, I’m doing a to do list for each week end. This is something I’ve done over the years and never had much success with. I write an ambitious to do list and then I do NOTHING that’s on it.

My new “to do” list is compiled with the entire weekend in mind. That way, I can put stuff off until tomorrow if I want to. I also add in rewarding and fun stuff. Get groceries (which I really really hate to do) now looks like:

Make a grocery list.
Go to the grocery store.
Buy at least one decadent thing ~ wine maybe.
Unload groceries out of the car.
Put the groceries away.
Drink a glass of wine to take the whine out of that experience.

I also put plenty of stuff on there that I’m sure I will do, for example:

Drink 2 cups of coffee.
Relax and watch TV.
Go to Art Class with Layla. (I do this every Saturday, hell or high water).
Feed the dog.

And then there’s fun stuff that lightens my mood and gives me incentives to mark even more stuff off my list. This weekend I have:

Listen to music.
Howl at the moon.
Spend time with my family.

This way, I can start my weekend with stuff that’s fun and easy to mark as completed, and I don’t feel defeated or depressed by my list. Even if you aren’t a “list” person, I find that it really helps to break hard things down into smaller portions.

For me, being overwhelmed is one of the biggest reasons that I don’t get certain things done. What about you? What over whelms you? Can you divide it up into tiny little baby steps?

Posted in Radical Self Care | Tagged Just Do It, Lists, Motivational, Overcoming Obstacles | 2 Comments

Setting Boundaries

Published July 7, 2023 | By shirleytwofeathers

Setting boundaries is pretty important I think, and I’m not talking about the kind of boundaries depicted in the picture. Isolating yourself and ignoring everything except for what you are enjoying in the moment isn’t always a good idea.

Healthy boundaries is a phrase you see a lot on websites and in books but I’m not sure what that really means in real life. My personal experience with boundaries pretty much looks like that picture at the top of the page. There are some people, close friends and family who have the key to that gate. They also have my phone number. I’m pretty sure I’d drop everything for them if they needed me.

Because I felt somewhat clueless on this subject, I asked Google to find me something about healthy boundaries. This little tidbit at Better Up seemed good.

Our personal boundaries should always be heard and never excluded from any relationship. To give you an idea of what personal boundaries can look like, here are five examples:

Ownership and agency over your financial assets.
The ability to stay true to your sense of self, spiritual beliefs, and passions.
Ability to prioritize personal time for self-care.
The right to change your mind and preferences.
Alone time with no distractions or interruptions.

And I am thinking that it might be really interesting to think about what you would like your personal boundaries to be. What might they look like? Have you set good boundaries? What boundaries are being crossed? How does that happen? And are you respecting your self when it comes to these boundaries?

For example:

I do pretty good with numbers 1, 2, and 4. I really suck at prioritizing personal time for self-care. I have a lot of personal time and alone time, but I almost never use it for self-care.

As for number 5, that one is tricky. I do have a fair amount of time with no distractions or interruptions, but if my family calls, I answer the phone. Every time. Which I think is ok because if I really do need a “no interruption” time out, I can give everyone a heads up and they respect that.

HOWEVER! I find that I do not give my self hardly any alone time with no distractions … most of my alone time is spent on distractions… So… that’s something to work on.

So now what?

Let’s put some thought into our personal boundaries… figuring out what they actually are… deciding what we want them to be. Write a list. Maybe do a little research. Ask our really good friends what they think…. Let’s do something about our boundaries. Something easy. Something small. They are your boundaries. They can be whatever you want them to be!

Posted in Radical Self Care | Tagged Just Do It, Know Yourself, Self Esteem | 4 Comments

Acts Of Intention

Published August 2, 2020 | By shirleytwofeathers

So, yesterday’s words of power, brought me to today’s Acts of Intention because as I was going through my day being powerful and commanding I realized that each of my words of power were followed up with decisive action. When I got into my car and commanded it to take me to the grocery store, I wasn’t magickally transported to the store…. No. It required multiple words of power and acts of intention. I turned the key and said, “Engine On.” I pulled out of the driveway and said, “And Now I Ride.”

But what if I had done what I so often do when I want my life to go in a particular direction? What if I had hesitated in front of my car and conjured up all kind of doubts and angst? I might have said stuff like:

What if the car door won’t open?
What will I do if my car won’t start?
The tires are probably flat, are they flat? Probably.
Who would I call if the car won’t start?
And what could they do?
Would anyone even care?
Is help for one such as me even available?
And supposing the car does start, what then?
Do I have enough gas to go anywhere?
What if I don’t have enough gas?
What if I run out of gas?
Then what?
I call someone?
But what if I run out of gas somewhere and my phone is dead?
What if my phone isn’t dead but there’s no signal?
What if a serial killer stops to “help” me?
And supposing I do have enough gas, what if my car breaks down?
What if I have a flat tire?
What if I get lost?
Do I even know the way to the store?
And when I get there, assuming I don’t get lost, then what?
What if someone in the store throws a fit about masks and starts throwing things around?
What if they throw things at me?
What if I throw things back at them?
And the cops come?
Then what?
Will someone get shot?
Will I end up in jail?

I could go on and on and on with this… And it’s fun, but it’s also ridiculous. I expect my car will start, and I expect that I can go to the store, and I expect that it will all work out fine. Why? Because it usually does. And those rare times when it all goes south, I have somehow managed to muddle through.

So, the moral of the story is. Words of power, followed by decisive acts of intention… that’s real magick. That’s how we get through life. That’s how we follow through on our Five Simple Things. That’s how we don’t get mired down in doubt and angst and ridiculousness.

Posted in Five Simple Things | Tagged Just Do It, Magick, Overcoming Obstacles, Setting Goals | 2 Comments

What Can I Do Today?

Published February 20, 2019 | By shirleytwofeathers

For our very first exercise, we just have a simple question.

What one, single, easy thing can I do TODAY – out of all the many things I COULD be doing! – that:

I WANT to do,

… and that …

… will bring the GREATEST rewards in the long run?

Take 60 seconds to reflect on this and then … go and do THAT!

From:

Dr Silvia Hartmann
The 60 Second Wealth Creators
Provided by www.DragonRising.com

Posted in Sixty Second Wealth Creators | Tagged Just Do It, Questions | 4 Comments

Getting Mugged

Published August 17, 2017 | By shirleytwofeathers

Yesterday, we explored a magickal cup of coffee, and it got me thinking about coffee mugs and so I went on a DIY search and found a bunch of tutorials on how to personalize and decorate coffee mugs. The first tutorial, found at Pop Sugar, features the use of sharpies. Here it is:

How to Make A Sharpie Mug

Do you have a plain, boring mug that needs a bit of spicing up? Personalize your cups and mugs by drawing on them! You can use them to add personality to your home or even give them as gifts to your loved ones. Here’s how to start:

Buy some white cups or mugs. You can find them in superstores, thrift stores, dollar stores, and online. The cheaper the mug, the better this works.
Pick a Sharpie. For long-lasting results, choose oil-based paint Sharpie markers. Regular Sharpie ink can come off even after baking. Pick a color to use on your mug. You can stay simple and choose one color, or be more ambitious and use multiple. If you’re sticking to one color, then black is usually a good choice, given its striking contrast to the white background of the mug.
Wash the mug. Before applying the Sharpie, it’s important to get the mug completely clean and free of any oily residue from hands or fingers. Alcohol works well, after the mug has been washed with soap and water.
Start drawing. Decide what you want to put on the cup, and maybe practice drawing it on a piece of paper before drawing on the mug. Pick a meaningful quote or a cute graphic to decorate the mug with, and get inspired by mugs being sold on Etsy or by googling examples of Sharpie mug projects online.
Dry it out. For the best results, let the sharpie dry completely for 24 hours then bake at a low temp oven like 225° for 2 plus hours.
Bake it. Remember to place the mug in the oven before it heats up and leave it in until the oven cools completely so there won’t be any cracks. You can choose to bake the mugs twice to really set in the Sharpie drawings. Baking the mug in the oven for 30 minutes at 350°F is what most tutorials recommend, but for best results, bake it at a lower temperature for a longer period of time (see above).
Care and wash. If you use quality, oil-based sharpies, they should be dishwasher safe. All my pieces have gone through the dishwasher several times now, with no flaw. If you don’t feel sure about the dishwasher – hand washing is recommended.

Does it really work?

While Sharpie mugs are very popular right now, there doesn’t seem to be any consensus on how to best make the mugs. Some say that some of the colors change when baked, some say that they don’t stand up to dishwasher washing (or handwashing even…), and some say that the paint chips off the mugs after a couple uses.

I found an experiment using 14 colors of oil-based, fine point Sharpies and Dollar Tree mugs at Destination Decoration, and her results were as follows:

While decorating the mugs, I wore gloves so the oils from my skin did not affect the finished product. All parts of the mug were dried for 24 hours before baking.

Based on my experiment, baking a Dollar Tree mug at 250 degrees for 2 hours provided the best results. The color of the paint remained largely the same and paint on the mug did not chip at all (except for the minor top chipping).

Tips from other tutorials and crafters:

I used Pebeo Porcelaine 150 Paint Markers and they work great and do not come off. You can find them at Michaels or Amazon.com. I have even put them in the dishwasher. Stayed on great.
It didn’t work for me! I just got a paint pen. They work perfectly fine and not any more expensive than sharpies.
I monogrammed plates and cups with Sharpie oil based markers and did not bake. Let dry for 48 hours been in dishwasher many times and none of mine have come off at all.
Here is what I find that works. Cheap Walmart mugs are best. Regular sharpies. Wipe first with alcohol to remove any residue. Careful not to touch drawing area with hands. After putting design on, wait 24 hours. Then put in cold oven. Turn temp to 425 and set timer for 30 minutes. At 30 minutes turn off oven, leaving project in until it’s completely cool. Hand wash then do a test run in the dishwasher.
“I read an extensive article about this somewhere. First, cheap mugs work best due to the inexpensive glaze used. Put mugs in COLD oven, turn oven to 450 (not 350). The glaze needs to re-melt to incorporate the marker into it!! AFTER oven reaches temp, bake for 30 minutes. Turn oven off.. LEAVE MUGS IN CLOSED OVEN (not yelling, just important). Cool for 15 min, slightly crack oven open and let cool over night. This should properly incorporate the ink with the glaze.
My aunt did it one year, I think she used car paint for scratch fixes. Not sure about the baking part. They lasted for years!
You can get enamel/glass clear medium and paint over it with that and re-bake. That may help if that doesn’t work, then probably nothing will.
Clean glass with rubbing alcohol first. Oil base isn’t for glass. Use Folk Art enamels paint applying with a brush or paint pens for glass only! You still have to bake for 30 minutes but let sit for 1 hour before you bake.

Design Ideas

Posted in Living As If | Tagged Creativity, DIY, Just Do It | 1 Comment

Just Do It!

Published April 12, 2017 | By shirleytwofeathers

It has been my experience with the Prosperity Project, that somewhere around day 10 or 11, I begin to lose my excitement, my enthusiasm, my drive. I also tend to procrastinate, and have a history of completing projects and tasks at the last conceivable moment. I’m probably not the only one, so I’ve brought Shia LeBeouf in to give us a talking to: