Daddy Time

We’ve talked about our inner child and our inner mom… but what about our inner dad? There’s nothing more comforting than having a Dad come over and help you deal with big practical problematic stuff.

My actual dad was not someone I could call on when I needed help with life on earth, but my husband and his dad could always be counted on to fix stuff that was broken. They would be there, probably cussing and complaining the whole time, but they would be there getting their hands dirty and the job done.

Sometimes I wish I had modeled my inner dad after them, but I didn’t. If I had, maybe my house and my car would be in better shape. Maybe… or maybe not…. I don’t know.

What about your inner dad? What are his qualities and attributes? How does your life reflect what your actual dad taught you? Are you trying to be more like him? Or the opposite of him? How does your relationship with your inner dad reflect your relationship with your actual dad, and what does that look like in terms of self care?

I modeled my inner dad after my actual dad. He was really good at telling stories, he definitely walked his talk and practiced what he preached. This I do… not so sure how good I am at telling stories, but I do enjoy talking and blogging and my art always has a little story embedded in it. I also do my best to practice what I preach.

He was also really good at puttering around totally ignoring my mom’s drama, and when the shit hit the fan, he could be counted on to take the dog for a long long walk. I do that too… But in terms of self care? Clearly, something is lacking here. Is that because it’s too easy for me to exit the building when stuff goes down that makes me uncomfortable? Interesting…

And I wondered what would happen if I invited my inner dad over for dinner. Could I ask him for help? Would be give me good counsel? Provide solutions to problems? Would it look something like this?

Or would it look more like this:

What about you? Is your inner dad very much like your actual dad? Or totally different? Do you need to give your inner dad a bigger role in your life? Or do you need to bump him back a bit? What about your actual dad? What can you learn from him? Even if he’s gone from this world, there might still be something you could learn…