stuff I do

I am finding this whole thing so surreal… And I find that I am surprisingly paralyzed in the midst of this amazing time when I am forced… FORCED… to stay home and go no where… a dream come true on so many levels.

Interestingly, my daughter, who passed away last April, made a point of sending me an intense message about 6 months ago. She spoke very vividly and powerfully to a friend of mine who was in meditation, and she said:

“Tell my mom.
A storm is coming.
Watch for it.”

I have been wondering what the heck she was talking about ever since. Not any more. I think this has to be it. If this isn’t an almost perfect storm, I don’t know what is.

So, how to cope? How to manage? What do do?

If I figure it out, I will let you know. I am trying to make myself work on my website today. I’m just having a little trouble finding my way in. In the mean time, here is some eye candy.

So this is what I did today! I had a session with the are you ready for it? The Co-Creative White Brotherhood Medical Assistance Program !! I know how crazy that must sound! But it was amazing and wonderful, and, well… I’ve set up a series of appointments for every Tuesday morning.

So what the heck is it? Some kind of weird cultish white supremacist wacko thing? Not at all.

I found out about it when I read a book called, “Behaving As If The God In All Life Mattered” which I bought because I loved the title. That book talked about the MAP (Medical Assistance Program) and so I bought that book as well. Now, this was somewhere in the neighborhood of 10 years ago…. and I got a lot of benefit from it for a while. Then, my interests and energy shifted, and I put it aside.

And then stuff happened, a lot of stuff, and I started to have the thought that I should pull it out of my “bag of tricks” and start doing it again.

Again the question, so what the heck is it?

Well, it’s a little hard to explain, but I’ll give it a go. It’s an organized method of contacting the healing energy of spirit, your guides, the Devas of healing, and that universal source of love and light that we often benefit from without even realizing it. Once contacted, you set up a “meeting” and a healing session.

The meeting and the healing session is a sort of meditation that you simply allow to happen, and participate in as the receiver of the energy, the balancing, and the clearing, or whatever else is required based on the issue you are requesting assistance with.

How do you do it?

If you are interested in trying it out, I would recommend that you buy the book. There is a lot of information connected with this simple process, and having the book will be extremely helpful if you have questions, or are unsure about it.

Here are links to both books on Amazon:

The first thing you need to have is a way to be sure about your communication with your “team.” Intuitive knowing works well for some, but I needed a way to be absolutely sure that I wasn’t making it all up in my head.

So here’s what I did. I sat down and got quiet. Then, I asked my guides and angels to give me a clear signal of what a “Yes” answer would feel like in my body. For me, that came as a clenching of my solar plexus. I can’t remember what the “No” answer feeling was, and I should probably get that cleared up before my next session.

Anyway, that “Yes” answer signal has been extremely helpful to me over the years. I even used it once when I was trying to decide if buying an electric toothbrush was a good idea or not. And I will say, that I really really love my electric toothbrush! So. That’s what works for me.

You will need to figure out what works for you. It could be anything from a muscle twitch in your hand to a spontaneous smile. Do the meditation, and go with whatever feels right.

Next you will need a time and place where you can lay on your back, in a comfortable place, with absolutely no interruptions for an hour. Pillows, blankets, the floor, the bed… doesn’t matter where, just that you are warm and comfortable and have no worries about being interrupted or disrupted while having your session. Set an alarm so that you won’t be wondering what time it is, or possibly falling asleep and being “gone” for hours.

The First Session:

Before you begin your first session, make sure you are comfortable. Lay on your back, pillows under the knees, or wherever they need to be so that you feel very relaxed and comfortable. If it is too uncomfortable to lay on your back, you can also be in a relaxed sitting position. Either way, do not cross your legs, arms, or hands.

  • Note: A “Coning” is what the author calls the healing session. The word coning doesn’t resonate well with me, so I usually say “session” instead, and it seems to work just fine.

To begin the session, state out loud, or to yourself: I would like to open a MAP coning. I would like to be connected with the following:

  1. Overlighting Deva of Healing ~ wait 10 seconds or use your “Yes” answer to confirm.
  2. Pan ~ wait 10 seconds or use your “Yes” answer to confirm.
  3. White Brotherhood Medical Unit ~ wait 10 seconds or use your “Yes” answer to confirm.
  4. Your higher self ~ wait 10 seconds or use your “Yes” answer to confirm.

I have a tendency to forget to call in my higher self when setting up a session, and always find myself calling in my highest guides, and all those in Spirit who love me. And I think it’s probably okay for you to call in anyone else you would want to have with you at the session.

Give yourself another ten to fifteen seconds to adjust to the energy.

The “coning” is now open and you are ready to begin. It’s that simple. It is not important if you did not have any sensations as the coning was activated. Your sensations or lack of sensations will not affect the quality of the coning in any way. What is important is that you be the one to call it into activation.

The first session is for scanning purposes only. This is the one session when you need not talk to your team if you don’t wish. The purpose of this session is to key you into their level, identify your various energy patterns, and get an appropriate medical team identified and working with you. This team will work with you during all your medical sessions.

Sometimes there will be visiting experts, and sometimes the team will shift and change. You do not have to do anything special for this to occur. Your primary team will be those who work with you during the majority of your sessions.

The initial scanning session will last an hour. You may feel gentle shifts and energy flowing throughout your body during this session. Or you may even feel like you are floating or moving. You also may feel absolutely nothing. Don’t worry about this. The work is going on.

When your timer goes off, the session is over. This is when you follow the protocol for ending the session.

  • If this is your first session, request that you be given your code – a symbol, word, or sensation that you can use to identify your team. Whatever pops into your mind next will be it.
  • Don’t discount what happens once you request the code. My code word is “code” which I found so doubtful that I tried to turn it into codex. So for me, it’s “code ~ codex”  because I am not quite sure which is right. So, don’t do what I did. Just accept that first word, symbol, or sensation.

The protocol for ending the session is quite simple. Focus on each member separately, thanking that member and asking to be disconnected. To be sure that the disconnection has taken place, you can ask “Am I disconnected?” and then wait for your “Yes” or “No” answer. If the answer is a “No” simply state again that the session is now over, thank you so much, and please disconnect me.

Wait twenty-four hours before opening the next session if this was your first one. The body needs that time to adjust to the impact of the coning and the expansion of working with the “White Brotherhood Team.” Once you have waited the initial twenty-four hours, you do not need to wait that long again. You will be able to initiate a session anytime you feel a need.

I have a planned schedule of once a week on Tuesday mornings. This schedule can be changed if need be. I like a planned schedule because it helps me to remember to do it. If planned schedules don’t work for you, that’s fine too.

Regular Sessions:

Lie down on your back (or sit). Get comfortable. Cover yourself with a blanket if you wish. Set your alarm for 40 minutes.

To begin the session, state out loud, or to yourself: I would like to open a MAP coning. I would like to be connected with the following:

  1. Overlighting Deva of Healing ~ wait 10 seconds or use your “Yes” answer to confirm.
  2. Pan ~ wait 10 seconds or use your “Yes” answer to confirm.
  3. White Brotherhood Medical Unit ~ visualize your team’s symbol or say the code word ~ wait 10 seconds or use your “Yes” answer to confirm.
  4. Your higher self ~ wait 10 seconds or use your “Yes” answer to confirm.

Wait ten to fifteen seconds after activating the full coning so that your body can stabilize itself within the coning and with the team.

Now, focus your attention on the session and your team. If you can’t feel or sense your team, just keep your focus on the session. Describe as fully as you can how you are feeling. This includes how you feel physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Relax about what you are about to articulate. You get better with practice.

  • Note: It is helpful to speak to your team out loud because this makes it easier to maintain your focus on what you are feeling, however it is not necessary. You can talk to your team silently and it will be just as effective. Do whatever works best for you.

This is kind of like when you make a visit to the Dr’s office, and you talk about what it is that brought you there. When describing symptoms to your team, be as precise and as accurate as possible. Try not to go for generalities, and avoid giving a name to your symptoms. For example, instead of saying “I have asthma.” Say, “It’s hard for me to breathe when…” And then describe the physical feelings and the situations that trigger them.

Allow forty minutes for the session to be completed. If you feel uncomfortable during the session, tell your team what you are feeling, and then relax and trust that at the end, whatever adjustments and shifts that were making you uncomfortable will have been completed.

It is best to move as little as possible during a session, but if you feel a strong need to move or change position, tell your team and ask if it will be okay. Any time you have questions, ask them. Follow your intuition and if you are unsure about something, speak up.

At the end of forty minutes, thank your team, and close the session by saying out loud, or silently: I’d like to close the coning. I’d like to disconnect from:

  • My Higher Self
  • My White Brotherhood Medical Team
  • Pan
  • The Overlighting Deva of Healing

Thank and disconnect from anyone else you may have invited to stand in. Wait for a few moments, and then verify that you have been disconnected.

Yay! Now it’s done. So, how do you feel? What happened? Anything interesting? You might want to write about it, or make a few notes. And, as always after an energy session, drink a glass of water and if possible go outside to get grounded and clear.

What Was My Experience?

My experience today was really interesting. I hadn’t done this in such a long time and I didn’t really remember all the exact protocols, so I just did it as an initial scan. I did, however, mention to them that I felt as if I had an energy sucking demon sitting on my chest that I didn’t quite know how to get rid of.

The energy was great. At one point I felt as if my mind expanded past the confines of my brain and that was really nice. Grandfather, one of my Native American, guides showed up, haven’t seen him in a long time, so that was fun.

Unfortunately, I was using my phone as my timer, and a flash flood alert jarred me out of it for a few moments right towards the end of the session. But I was able to slide right back in. And we did an interesting thing of taking my energy sucking demon and giving him a home in a cool chunk of rock that I brought home from my camping trip.

I promised him that if he would hang out in the rock, that I would give him all my angst and agony to feed on if he would agree that they were now HIS and no longer MINE. I also gave him permission to pull any of my “bad” energy off of me whenever I walk by. And so, instead of “getting rid” of him, we made friends, and he now has a nice spot next to a snakeskin, a skull, and a multi headed dragon incense burner. He seems happy there. I burned a cone of Myrrh for him as an offering of thanks. Fun, huh?

I feel quite a bit lighter, and cleaner. So.. it was all good!

I have a gagillion questions for God. It’s quite a list.

  • What is my purpose in life?
  • Am I doing what I’m supposed to be doing?
  • Am I supposed to be doing anything in particular?
  • Is the concept of “supposed to be” even a valid one?
  • Do you love me?
  • Am I acceptable?
  • Am I a miserable failure?
  • Who are you anyway?
  • Why am I here?
  • What do you want from me?
  • How do you expect me to know what you want if you don’t tell me anything in plain English?
  • Do you speak English?
  • Who am I really?
  • Why am I having so much trouble doing and/or being … (insert long list here) … ?
  • Can I please have a bunch of money so I can get out of debt?
  • I would very much like for you to call me up on the phone every day so we can have a nice long talk, would you please do that for me?
  • How can I make sure that the answer to the previous question is “yes”?
  • You could give me a big red phone. It could say “hot line to God” on it. Everyday it could ring, and I would answer it. We could be friends, you could help me with stuff, wouldn’t that be fun?
  • Maybe I could even help you with stuff, don’t you think that would be fun?
  • Of course, you probably never need help… (insert big sigh of relief on my part), that’s true, isn’t it? You’re the Master of the Universe, you don’t need any help with anything, do you?
  • Especially not from me, right?
  • Maybe you don’t even know who I am. Do you know me? Have we met before?
  • What is actually true?
  • Are you reading this list of questions right now?
  • Do you think maybe you might answer one of them today?
  • What if I said “please”?

I painted today.
It’s a paint or die type stream of consciousness painting as process painting…

Today the working title is
A fish out of water catches a lightning bolt in his mouth.

So.
I’m inspired.

I came to the astounding conclusion that my life is just up to me and God-in-me. It’s a personal thing. We can work this ‘life on earth’ thing out just between the two of us. In our own way. In our own time. I don’t need help. I don’t need anything. I don’t need anybody. This is a me and creator spirit thing.

And at the same time…

Other people are valuable in my life.
Their support is great.
Their love is important.
Their acceptance is precious.

And so…
I painted today, and it was good.

Note: This was written back in 2004, and I cannot find the painting, so I substituted a different one. The one I used is from my short lived “Fire In The Belly” project. Looks like I’ll have to make another one, maybe even a series of “fish out of water” paintings!

If an image has posted without permission please leave a comment and I will happily remove it, replace it, give credit, link love ~ whatever you prefer.

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